"All aboard the crazy train!

I'm officially a Housewife. . .and I have an orange! Hooray! YOLO (You Only Live Once) is my "catchphrase," and is basically why I decided to do the show. It seems to be my motto in this season of my life. I am excited for this journey and opportunity and am grateful you are on it with me.

When Alexis came over and we had a playdate at my house, I mentioned my meeting with Heather. I went on to mention the whole diamond ring thing because I knew it would come out eventually, so I was trying to be direct with her. I think it is insightful to watch yourself back on video -- not everyone gets to do this in life. I am trying to take this gift as a learning opportunity. Evidently, not only am I a hugger but I am also a laugher. I seem to laugh in awkward situations or when I am a bit uncomfortable. I obviously am uncomfortable asking Alexis about her "fake" diamond ring, but I also wanted to know why Heather would tell me this and if it is true.

Speaking of awkward. . .the dinner with the Dubrows was not actually awkward at all. It was a fabulous dinner. Heather and I got along really well, and we all laughed and had a great time. I think the whole magazine "cover" drama was blown way out of proportion. Heather is obviously beautiful and would make a great cover. She demonstrates elegance and class. However, we were not looking for a cover feature at that time. We only have four issues a year and the cover gets secured quickly.

Heather asking for the cover shows she is media savvy and confident. Heather and I are so OK with all of it. The Dubrow's ended up doing the architectural feature and you can see it in our latest issue of Beverly Hills Lifestyle (and online at BHLmag.com). It turned out amazing and it was a pleasure to work with them.

The topic of Slade's son Grayson is very sad. I can't imagine what they have gone through and continue to go through. We pray for Grayson and his family for strength and love in such a hard situation. I can't imagine the hard moments they face every day and my heart does go out to them.

The night of the CUT party was hard for me to experience. Watching it on TV, it's a dramatic, entertaining episode of a TV show. . .however, living through it was intense and shocking.

Meeting Vicki was fun and in a lot of ways I feel like we are kindred spirits. It was the "woo hoos" uniting us, and I've been having fun with her ever since. Before we all even walk into the party I'm "guilty by association," as Tamra declares. It is cool to see Heather trying to back me up, and it is much appreciated. I also like that Heather is trying to see the good in Alexis and even offers the idea to the ladies that maybe Alexis wants to make up and gives her the 'benefit of the doubt."

When we do show up, it was nerve-racking. Heather made a big effort to get up and come greet me. That made me feel a little at ease. It may seem like a small gesture, but I remember that night and it made me feel very good, like she had my back. Tamra also got up and showed Alexis and me around. She was a gracious host and at first I felt like the ice was maybe broken and we would have a good night. . .

Once we all sat down the tensions began to rise again. Gretchen wouldn't even look our way. Watching it back now, I see that she obviously has a lot of issues with Alexis and I was just feeling that energy. However, that night, I felt like she was cold and unfriendly and didn't want me around. She clearly has a lot going on in her personal life but I didn't know any of this. All I knew is I'm new to this group of woman and she would barely look look at me, yet alone talk to me. When I tried to engage her all I got was one word answers.

Once the fighting began I am like a deer in headlights. I had never experienced anything life this. I was not mentally prepared for such passionate feelings of anger, hurt, and bitterness. Again, I laugh at an inappropriate time. Heather says, "I just glazed" and Alexis declares, "Me too." They both make this dramatic hand movement. I seriously am just overwhelmed and can't believe this is happening all around me and that I'm right in the middle of it all. I have a lot of respect for Heather and Alexis, so to see them upset I was taken aback. I was not anticipating all this tension and apparently my go to is laughter. . .again. If I could go back and re-do this night, there is obviously a lot of changes I would make. If only life were that simple.

Yikes. We haven't even left the building yet. I can't wait to see how this turns out -- and I lived through it!"

I'm really liking Lydia so far. Thoughts on what she had to say? How are you liking Lydia?