After nearly three decades of marriage, Real Housewives of Orange County star Heather Dubrow is pulling back the curtain on what really keeps her and husband Terry Dubrow going strong.
At the 2025 Step Up Inspiration Awards on Sept. 26, Heather got candid with E! News about the real foundation of her relationship, and spoiler alert, it’s not just glitz and glamour.
“Marriage has to be rooted in faith, and relationships take a lot of work,” she said. “Terry and I have been together 29 years, and we’ve been so lucky.”
But luck alone doesn’t make a nearly 30-year relationship last. According to Heather, it’s about the little things that make a big difference.
“What I love most about him is that he shows up,” she explained. “He always has a smile, and no matter what I’m wearing, he’ll make me feel beautiful. Having a partner like that just gives you the confidence to step out the door and take on the world.”
And while the pair share a full life—with four kids, 21-year-old twins Nick and Max, Kat (18), and Ace (14)—Heather admits that “balance” is more of a myth than a reality.
“Honestly, I don’t think perfect balance exists,” she shared. “People always talk about ‘having it all,’ but to me, that’s about realizing that wherever you are in your life right now—you already have it all. Accepting that really shifts your perspective.”
It’s not just their marriage that’s rooted in intentionality; the Dubrows are also deeply proud of the family they’ve built. Three of their four children are LGBTQ+, and Terry says that their parenting journey has given them a greater sense of purpose.
In his own interview with E!, Terry reflected on a conversation he once had with Heather:
“‘We were chosen for it. That’s what we’re supposed to do with our platform,’” he told her.
And while he joked about having different dreams, Would I prefer to be chosen for being a multi-billionaire building hospitals all over the world like Bill Gates…? Maybe,” he said—Terry made it clear that he sees this as a calling. “But that’s not the platform that I was given by the universe. So, this is the platform, and I recognize that. And I’m grateful for that.”
As public figures, the Dubrows know their influence extends beyond reality TV. That’s why they’re intentional about being visible role models for other families.
“If we can change hearts and minds by showing how our version of a normal, supportive family can be, we’re in,” Terry said. “We try to be role models for these conversations… and we’re honored.”
His advice for other parents? Surprisingly practical.
“Act like there are cameras around and that you’re going to be held accountable for the way you act,” he shared. “That immediately removes all of your preconceived douchiness you might have.”
And the real secret? “Give your kids a supportive, loving environment. That’s the perfect place to start.”
